It’s hard to embrace change sometimes, even when you know it’s for the best.

The better you are at letting go of things, the freer your hands will be to catch something new.

It’s a quote from “Off the Map,” the first community theater play in which I was an actress. It was my character’s line, and I didn’t fully appreciate what it meant then. Spoken to her 11-year-old daughter, who is struggling with changes, it had a very literal meaning.

I think I understand a bit more now.

But I’ve also let go of a lot of things and caught new things since I first learned that line more than a decade ago.

The full quote from the play by Joan Ackermann talks about change:

“You know, sometimes change feels like loss, like you’re losing something and it’s sad, but change is just a way of clearing space for something new. Sometimes you have to be really clever to see what that new thing is, but it’s almost always there. Life is full of changes, Bo, that’s what’s so interesting about it. The better you are at letting go of things, the freer your hands will be to catch something new.”

 

Change is hard

Despite everything I’ve done – and continue to do – change is hard. Inevitable, but hard.

Perhaps because I have changed so much, I struggle with other changes that feel like loss.

Right now, I’m sitting on an email, dithering over whether to send it and step away from something I really enjoyed and that helped me tremendously over many months.

But my circumstances have changed, and the situation has changed. Now, I actually dread parts of it.

Shouldn’t that be an obvious sign it’s time to change?

And yet, I want to hang on, feeling that if I let it go, it’s one more thing I don’t have anymore.

Then, too, I feel like, what if I need it down the road, and I’ve not kept it.

 

Hoarding against change

I guess that’s the hoarding mentality I see in others. Except where they may keep piles of newspapers, cupboards of food and stockpiles of toilet paper, I hoard my “necessities” — like my work. After all, in a couple of years when I want to move back to Portugal, I’ll need a fully remote job again, so why not keep the one I’ve got?

Because a lot can change in a couple of years.

Coming at it from a place of need, scarcity and lack is not a good way to look at it. That leads to the hoarding mentality. Rather, I should approach it from a place of abundance. I should generate other revenue streams that will better serve me in the years ahead rather than relying on a one that was good in the past.

Of course, that’s easier said than done.

The email waits.

I know I will hit send. It’s just hard to embrace change sometimes.

 

How to Be a Better Writer

Set aside a little time every day to write

I’m taking my own advice and setting aside time to write. Over the past several months, I haven’t written as much as I should have for my personal projects or this website. Still, though, I technically write every day.

Now, I want to focus again on my writing and finding ways to reach a broader audience. Writing every day is the best way to keep in practice and improve.

If you find you’re super busy – like I was getting to be – you may need to set aside a few minutes early in the day or late at night to jot down your thoughts. I also like to “write” when I take a walk or a longer drive. It allows me to think about what’s on my mind and how it might be turned into a column or something else.

Don’t let yourself get too busy. Carve out a few minutes to write, if writing is really what you want to do!