At the end of our lives, what will we have?

Stuff? Houses? Careers? Stocks? Money?

For billions of people in the world, that’s not even an option. They will reach the end of their lives in poverty, without assets that we in the western world consider riches.

No, when it comes to the end, we will be left with our memories – if we are able to retain them – and our relationships.

It’s not about things but people and the experiences we share with them.

I’ve known this for a long time, but it’s become so much clearer recently.

Too much stuff

For years, I felt burdened by the stuff in my life. It filled my closets, cupboards, house and life. Too much stuff. So much stuff, I finally couldn’t bear it anymore, and I got rid of it. All of it. Or nearly all of it. What remains would fit in (or on) the trunk of my car.

My new mantra has been to not buy gifts for people except consumables or experiences. I’ve pretty much stuck to that. We really don’t need more stuff. None of us. Chances are, we can live without the latest kitchen gadget or electronic toy. We don’t need more clothes, furniture or knickknacks. Even when it comes to food and necessities, we are doing OK.

As a nation, a society, we are very blessed. We have so much.

If you have enough, what’s left?

The people with whom you share it: Friends and family.

Friends: The Family We Choose

Friends from work gave me a framed photo that says, “Friends: The Family We Choose.”

It’s true. We are born (or raised) by families who (usually) love us and have our best interests at heart. Friends are the people we connect with who aren’t tied by blood. They might share our values, dreams, goals or just a piece of our heart. We have friends who understand us, who listen to us, who want only the best for us and encourage us to be our best.

These are the people we seek out to share our lives.

Sometimes, friends come and go. But when we have them, they mean a lot to us. We make memories together, and those can last a lifetime.

When we come to the end of our lives, we still will have those memories of good times, good friends, family who love us and time well spent.

Visiting Wisconsin recently really brought home to me how important friends and family are. Even separated by miles, even with my latest life choices, I’m grateful for the people I call friends and those who always will be family. Thank you for sharing my journey. Thank you for your love, support and for choosing me.

Be a Better Writer Tip

I’ve written previously about focusing on a specific incident when you write, although my last two posts haven’t followed that advice. They are more generalized. However, both are reflections from my recent visit to Wisconsin. I have had specific instances in mind when writing sections, but not anything that needs retelling. Instead, it was a conglomeration of events and instances that led to these pieces.

If you struggle to write or to find a focus for your writing, use a specific event or incident. Retell the story and weave in your thoughts and ideas about it. It’s OK to be more generic, though. Sometimes you won’t have a specific incident or event or it won’t be compelling enough to stand on its own. Then, you can keep it in mind as you write without going into the details of it.